somanyfeelings | IC Inbox

I'll grab Uri and some extra food and be on my way over.

[He'll even use Systema C.A.I.'s storm disk to get there much faster than he normally would via running.]

[He's by the door when he gets there so that he could answer. He didn't want to disturb Rei since he knew that he was also mourning the loss.]

[Gokudera knocks, quietly at first because well yeah there are other people possibly in mourning, so- HE IS PREPARED TO PRESENT CAT AND THEN FOOD! HE IS A GOOD FRIEND.]

[He answers the door and lets him in. There's a slightly pained smile on his face as he greets him.]

Hey...

[Gokudera would normally hug Makoto but after that whole kiss thing...

He holds out Uri instead, presenting the cat to Makoto.]

Here.

[Uri meows. Then purrs.]

[He looks down at the cat and takes her.]

Hello, Uri-chan. It's always good to see you.

[He pets her gently and holds her close.]

[Uri starts purring her little heart out, sensing a person in need of her special talents of being adorable. Meanwhile Gokudera takes his shoes off and re-shoulders the bag he brought with him.]

I brought some food too, I can put it in the kitchen, in case you get hungry later or something.

[HE'S TRYING TO HELP AND HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO HELP.]

[He looks over at Gokudera while still petting the vibrating Uri.]

I really appreciate it...

[YOU'RE HELPING GOOD!]

I'll help you put it away.

Only if you want to, I can do it myself too if you wanna just cuddle Uri for a bit. She missed you a lot, too.

You sure...?

Okay...I can't pass up that offer.

[It's cuddle time with Uri]

[Gokudera smiles a bit.] Get comfortable, I'll come find you when I've got stuff put away, it's alright.

Mhm. All right.

[He heads up to his room and settles onto his bed with Uri in tow. While he's there, he pets her and plays with her a little bit and lets her use him as a jungle gym.]

[All things Uri is happy to do, stomping around on his stomach and limbs like it is her job.

Gokudera's up before too long, bringing some hot tea with him as well because, uh, that's what you do when someone needs comfort, right? And tea's something he doesn't screw up. He sits at the edge of the bed and holds a mug out to Makoto.]

You want to keep her for a few days again?

[Makoto sits up when Gokudera comes in and takes the tea appreciatively.

He thinks about the question for a few moments as he blows on his tea gently.]
No...

I-It's okay...

You do...so much for me, Hayato...

Taking her off my hands for a few days is hardly any skin off my back, I think she likes you better than me anyway.

[... Actually, she's an integral part of some of his more advanced weaponry so it is a potential danger to let her out of his sight so often, but.

He wants to see Makoto smile again, so it's worth the risk if that makes him happy.]

[Makoto continues to stroke the kitty-cat with his free hand as he looks down into his tea.

There's a soft smile that comes to his face.]

Uri is always welcome here...so I guess I can't refuse.

[He takes a sip of his tea.]

Hayato...is it wrong of me to have wanted Nagisa to stay?

Nah. As fucked as this place is, I don't think anyone wants to see people they care about leave it while they're still here.

[He could really go for a cigarette and his fingers twitch slightly, but he just sips his tea instead.] They tell themselves 'at least they're safe now' and 'it's better they aren't here' as a consolation prize to try and make it hurt less that they're gone, and there's nothing anyone can do about it.

... At least, that's what it was for me when I said it was better that Yamamoto went home.

[His hand grips the tea cup a little as he tries to reign in his emotions. He didn't want to put Gokudera in a weird situation.]

I wish he could have still been here. He has a really...energetic personality and it was nice to have around.

[He set down his teacup onto the floor.]

You, Rei, Gou...

I don't want any of you to go... I feel selfish in saying so.

It isn't selfish. I don't want you to go, either.

[Makoto looks up at Gokudera and smiles just a bit, happy to hear that. He feels like he's made such a wonderful friend in Gokudera and that even though it's only been some four odd months, with everything that's happened, it's made their friendship even stronger than if they had just been schoolmates.]

Thanks...

[He reaches out and pulls Gokudera in for a strong, solid hug. He buries his face into his shoulder and tries not to cry again. There was so much happening that it was hard not to break down. First the scavenger hunt, nearly getting killed during an attack, then Nagisa leaving... It was a lot and Gokudera had been there every step of the way. For that, he was so grateful to have someone like that by his side.]

[Gokudera almost dropped his mug of tea, but he managed to set it aside to hug Makoto back after a moment, stroking his back and just trying to be there for the other boy.

He was so horrible, having ... thoughts about Makoto when the other boy just needed a friend. He was the absolute worst. There was no way Makoto would hug him or even touch him if he knew. Gokudera had been trying so hard to avoid the casual touching he had been getting used to with Makoto, even, to spare the other boy more pain and disgust if he ever found out what Gokudera was really thinking.

He just had to be a friend. Makoto needed a friend, not some pervert borderline stalker. Resolving anew to push his feelings down, even if he had to choke on them, he held Makoto close.]

... It's okay, if you need to cry.

[Makoto could feel his throat strain a bit before there was finally a soft, barely audible sob from him.

Even if Makoto knew about the thoughts Gokudera had about him, he wouldn't have traded this moment for much of anything in the world. This deep, meaningful bond that they were creating meant more to him than anything else.

He did feel a little guilty, though, for putting Gokudera into this position. He was sure the other's definition of good company wasn't having his shoulder become wet with tears from a very large boy. But that also only made him appreciate him that much more.]

[Even though it wasn't exactly his idea of a good time, no... Makoto needed him. As a friend, but he needed him. And it meant so very much to Gokudera to be needed at all.

The tears could be dried later, so who cared if they made things damp now? He stroked Makoto's back, making soft shushing sounds he hoped were soothing. He never really had anyone to do that for him, so he had to learn from movies.]

[After a short moment, Makoto pulled away with a small sniffle and wiped at his eyes quickly.]

Sorry...Thank you...

[He smiled to him.]

I feel...a lot better thanks to you...

[He would do the same for Gokudera at anytime and he hoped that Gokudera knew that as well.]

[Unused to that kind of support, Gokudera was the type that stewed in his feelings privately, not wanting others to see him as weak. ... He trusted Makoto not to judge him, though.]

Anytime. Really. Even if it's in the middle of the night or something, don't ever hesitate to call me, okay?

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